Think, for a moment, of a by-gone era in which the only form of communication between courting lovers who were separated was a letter. History is fraught with the love-sick words of both the famous and the infamous. Love letters were not reserved just for the separated, for there are numerous examples of lovers exchanging letters daily as a way to communicate their deep devotion. Below is an example from Beethoven.
July 6, 1806
My angel, my all, my very self — only a few words today and at that with your pencil — not till tomorrow will my lodgings be definitely determined upon — what a useless waste of time. Why this deep sorrow where necessity speaks — can our love endure except through sacrifices — except through not demanding everything — can you change it that you are not wholly mine, I not wholly thine?
Oh, God! look out into the beauties of nature and comfort yourself with that which must be — love demands everything and that very justly — that it is with me so far as you are concerned, and you with me. If we were wholly united you would feel the pain of it as little as I!
Now a quick change to things internal from things external. We shall surely see each other; moreover, I cannot communicate to you the observations I have made during the last few days touching my own life — if our hearts were always close together I would make none of the kind. My heart is full of many things to say to you - Ah! — there are moments when I feel that speech is nothing after all — cheer up — remain my true, only treasure, my all as I am yours; the gods must send us the rest that which shall be best for us.
Your faithful,
Ludwig
Not only do love letters serve as a proclamation of love, it is a platform for sincere thought, for love letters are especially reflective. There is a deep sense of the offering of our deepest and most intimate thoughts when we put them in writing and share them with our love.
Love letters do more than share sentiments, they bring form to the intangibility of love. They give us evidence of love. We can hold it, read it, reflect on it, read it again and respond and as with the example above, love letters stand the test of time. We know what Beethoven was feeling in 1806 because he put it in writing.
An additional advantage of communicating through love letters is that often more depth of expression occurs in the process of writing. When we compose a love letter, it is just us and our emotions and we are free to explore those emotions more fully, exploring more completely the depths of our love.
In our modern world of instant communication and immediate access to tweets, texts, status updates and instant messaging, something is lost, and it is something wonderful, that is very romantic and meaningful. It is the thoughtful expression of sincere sentiment that can be view time and again. Technology also limits the experience of viewing these sentiments in loving hand-formed words. There is something very personal about a hand-written letter. It is an art and is arguable that it is in itself a loving act.
I had the experience of sharing a love journal with my late husband. Every morning, I made an entry in the journal and left it under his pillow. When I got home at the end of the day, the journal would be under my pillow, filled with all the words I longed to hear from him, but he had difficulty verbalizing. He died suddenly and those pages have meant the world to me through the years since his death.
If your relationship needs a boost, translate your true feelings into written words. Be brave and communicate what is truly in your heart for your lover. Lift your communications to include more than when the kids need to be picked up or the trash needs to be taken out. Invest in communication that lasts. It truly is the gift that keeps on giving.
